Thank you

I’m thankful on this Thanksgiving Day for so many things, but I must say I’m particularly thankful this year for being alive.  The heart attack September 12^th makes me realize how close I came to not being able to type this today.  I’ve been alive for nine weeks longer than I might have been.  That’s pretty darned scary.

If my co-worker hadn’t traded me shifts that morning, I might not have woken up.  Thankfully, I was awake early that Wednesday morning to get ready for work so I noticed each symptom as it happened.  And, if I hadn’t worked at the hospital Emergency Room, I might not have gone in to the hospital ER to get checked because the pain was not that bad, and yet I ended up as a Code Stemi.   If some instinct hadn’t prompted me to tell Matt to go to the nearest facility rather than the one which I knew dealt with heart attacks, I might not have made it.  If the RN hadn’t been finishing her night shift and instructed the staff to do the second EKG after the first one didn’t show anything, I might not be alive today.  So many factors came together that morning that I am truly humbled. 

Death isn’t a topic we ordinarily discuss, and to me, it sometimes seems surreal in the sense that I don’t realize how close to death some people truly are until too late.  People are here one minute and gone in a split second.  I’m never ready for it.  I wish I would have told them how much I loved them and how much I cared. 

 I keep thinking I’m only 60, so how could I have been so close to death.  I certainly don’t feel that old, but if I’m 60, I’m definitely not as young as I must think I am.   I feel like I have so many more things to do, and I don’t want my son and daughter to have to deal with loss.  I’d like my grandchildren and future grandchildren to know me, too.

I know that sounds selfish, but I never really knew my grandfathers (one died before I was born and the other one died when I was only six), and there was never enough time with my grandmothers.   So, I would like to develop a wonderful relationship and rapport with my grandchildren, as well as be there for my children as they start on their journeys through adulthood, as my parents were for me.  I like the concept of family.  I think family can be a wonderful and supportive part of life.

 

Was it coincidence or just a fluke I survived that day?  Does God have more plans for me?  Have I been given the chance to improve and become a better person?  What direction do I need to go?    I stop every now and then, and remind myself, I need to be even more appreciative of all the wonderful things in this life.  As so many others have discovered and said, “Live each day to its fullest,” and “Stop and smell the roses.”  Mankind has been trying to tell all of this for decades and centuries.

So on this Thanksgiving 2012, thank you to all the wonderful people in my life, everyone from family to friends, and people whose paths cross mine..  You are all a special part of me, and I am glad I can be a part of your lives.  You are what makes the sun shine for me.  And, thank you, God, in all your infinite wisdom, for all of your guidance and care.  Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone.