Who the Hell Is Mowing?

      On this damp, dismal, gray Friday morning, like so many other gloomy days of this summer, I cannot believe my ears!  Incredibly, I hear the sound of a lawn mower.  I instantly begin muttering to myself until it turns into a growl to no one in particular, and I bark out, "Who the Hell is mowing?" 

     I look out the window.  Yes, indeed, as I suspected, one of my neighbors is mowing his lawn.....again.  That's the second time this week he's mowed.  Why can't he, along with the rest of my neighbors, wait at least a week to mow?  What is wrong with these wackos?  No one needs to mow more than once a week.  Heck!  You could even wait a week and a half and that would be great.  Don't these mowing maniacs realize how bad they make other neighbors and their yards look?  Are they sadists?  Is this a competition and they are trying to mow before anyone else and achieve that elusive "one upmanship"?  They need help.

     Grass is a part of nature and should be revered and enjoyed.  It's a natural part of the environment, along with beautiful wildflowers and trees. Yes, it should be maintained, but do we prune trees every 4 or 5 days?  Do these eager beavers cut their own hair every 4 or 5 days?  Then why cut the grass so often?

     Why is there such frequent mowing in my neighborhood?  What possesses people to do this?  I find it incomprehensible.   Why does one neighbor have a lawn service come in to mow with their professional machines, and then he goes out when he gets home and re-mows with his push mower?  Do these certifiable folks have nothing better to do with their time except to play "Yard Man"?  Are these henpecked husbands?  Are these women who have an OCD streak?  Are they trying to outdo the Joneses?  What are they thinking?

     I realize some of my neighbors actually put fertilizer and other stuff  on their yards to make the grass grow even faster than normal.  Are they totally insane?  Think about it -- people put chemicals on their lawns to make grass grow faster so they can mow more often.  I think these people need to be committed.

     Do these frenzied fruit loops find pleasure in these economically depressed times in spending all their hard-earned money on gasoline to mow so frequently?  We should be helping our country and not using gasoline unnecessarily.  Grass can wait a week, or even longer, to be mowed.  What is the deal?

     I do not share this urgent, incessant compulsion to butch my grass and act in a frivolous manner by spending money and gasoline to scalp it to acceptable proportions as dictated by the neighborhood nut cases.  I may be semi-retired, but I refuse to mow more than once a week no matter how much my grass grows.  Thank goodness the house on one side of me is still for sale, and their yard looks far worse than my jungle.

      Stop mowing the grass so often, you fanatic freakazoids, or I will turn you in and Mother Nature will deal with you!!!

    For the rest of you, please join the Less Mowing Is Beautiful movement!  You don't have to mow so often.  You can enjoy nature, plus help save the environment.  You can save money.  C'mon -- you know you want to become a part of the "grass roots" movement!

Dear Jennifer Lopez,

Dear Jennifer Lopez,

I confess that I didn't know much about you until this year and never really cared for you - I thought you were a stuck-up, high-class, Hollywood prima donna, a diva who used her looks to hook fans.   I was wrong.

Since you took the role of a judge on American Idol, the whole world learned about the real person you are.  You have personality, you care about others, and you're compassionate.  You took your job on the show seriously and professionally.  You let us in to see you as a great mother and wife, as well as someone who nurtured other aspiring singers.  We saw you  work hard and  share your art with a  performance on stage.  I was truly impressed by what I saw two nights a week on Fox.  I think that being a judge was one of the best things you could have done, not only for your career, but  because it showed people the real Jennifer Lopez, not just the persona and facade of the recording artist on stage.

Today, as I surfed the tv channels, I discovered a movie on television that I thought looked mildly interesting.  The blurb on the channel guide said the 2004 movie starred Richard Gere.  To my surprise, I recognized Max from Dancing with the Stars as well as you.  I smiled when I realized Paulina was indeed you, and that you would be dancing in the movie.   I loved your acting in Shall We Dance, plus your character portrayal.  The movie showed me one more side of a talented Jennifer Lopez. 

Thank you so much for sharing yourself with us this past American Idol season.  I'm glad to know you're such a warm, wonderful person -- in my opinion, you're not only classy, but a true star.

                                                                           A new fan

Write-on Writers Conference

I attended the fifth annual Write-on Writers Conference Saturday, April 30 in Coshocton, Ohio, along with fellow Y-City Writers member, Rita Smith.  We had a great time with some great people, enjoying the camaraderie as well as the displays set up.

A full-time professor at OSU from 1968 to 2001, specializing in American literature, poetry and folklore, Dan Barnes, Professor Emeritus, spoke at the opening session on The Sense of an Ending:  Some Models for Poets and Writers.  Dr. Barnes used excerpts from short stories, book reviews, poems, and a Frost as well as a Dickinson manuscript worksheet, along with playing the piano, to demonstrate how successful closure to any literary work is not only necessary, but how it can be achieved and even reinforced.

The first session I attended dealt with narrative poetry, and although it seemed intended for newer writers, I enjoyed the variety of narrative poetry presented as examples.  The presenters used poems by Robert Frost and Li Young Lee, as well as their own, and the discussion that ensued was lively and interesting.  They also included in the handout three writing exercises designed specifically for narrative poets to encourage more people to write poetry of this type.  (If you’re interested in seeing the handout, let me know.)

I participated in the second session conducted by Dan Barnes entitled “Poetic Closure,” which dealt in more depth with issues introduced in the opening session.  In order to participate in this particular workshop, each participant had to submit three of their own poems prior to the conference so Dr. Barnes could specifically show each individual closural strategies to improve and strengthen his/her own poem.  I learned so much from listening to his analysis of each person’s poem and his suggestions for improvement. 

 

Other workshop sessions included “Taking Your Book from Idea to Publication,” “Technology for Writers,” “Tweaking Ideas and Slanting Your Stories,” and “Songwriting.”  The closing featured three Ohio Poetry Association poets who read some of their poems, and then an Open Mic session for workshop participants rounded out the day.  Let me know if you need any information on any of the topics presented.

*An additional tidbit of information that might be interesting to the older crowd that I gleaned from the conference:  Did you know anyone 60 years old and older can take free classes at any of the Ohio universities and colleges?

*Dan Barnes also recommended the following short stories:  Hemingway’s “A Canary for One,” Edith Wharton’s “Roman Fever,” and Kipling’s “The Gardener.”

Living with a Senior Cat

Living with a 19 year old cat, who in human years is 92, provides a unique perspective on life with a senior cat, as well as provides some insights into life, in general.  

Like our other pets through the years, Chase was a rescue -- he was a stray no one seemed to claim or want.  We didn't plan to keep the long-haired, gray, baby kitten so we called him simply "Baby Cat" for the first six months or so of his life.  After my son saved the kitten's life by rescuing him from the fishing line in the garage wrapped around his throat and growing tighter as he struggled to free himself, we realized he was part of our family, and we officially named him Chase.  

In his prime, he weighed a whopping 22 pounds and hunted every day.  He adored me and loved me unconditionally, protecting me from evil vermin.  I always called him, "My Diamond in the Rough," as I sensed that below the surface he only followed polite house cat rules to please me. 

Five years ago at the age of 14, I noticed he didn't want out as often and didn't jump on the deck railing anymore to tap at the kitchen window when he wanted in.  I didn't realize at that point why his behavior had changed.  Later, I understood he was getting older and those things were harder for him to do.  His long, beautiful gray hair began matting to the extent I couldn't comb the mats out or trim them anymore, so we started taking him once a year at the beginning of summer to have the groomer give him a buzz cut.  I had to laugh the first time we picked him up as the groomer left longer hair around his face and at the end of his tail.  He looked like The Lion King, but he seemed to understand, that like senior citizens, he needed help with something he couldn't do for himself anymore.

When the young punk of an upstart kitten belonging to my daughter came to stay with us for a couple of months before her wedding, an older, wiser, more mature Chase got tired of the whippersnapper's antics one afternoon, and simply pinned the anti-social youngster to the ground with one paw and held him there until the young'un decided to surrender and quit bothering or hissing at the big cat.   Chase was simply well adjusted and used to a menagerie of other animals about him -- he was also tough enough to handle anything or anyone, including the hyper-active kitten.

Chase finally gave up going outside at all.  I think he realized he wasn't the active, young hunter anymore, and his arthritis made him yearn instead for a sun bath.  Chase's arthritis became more evident, and he could no longer jump up on anything or down.  I decided to make a bed of fleece blankets Matt donated so Chase could have a bed beside mine since I was afraid I would not hear him in the night when he wanted down from my bed.  I didn't want him to hurt himself or break a brittle bone if he jumped.  Chase adjusted to his bed beside mine.  He got up usually at least once in the middle of the night, like an old man, to go to the bathroom and refuel.  He always meowed politely to let me know he needed covered back up with his favorite Star Wars blanket, and then purred.  Again, like an elderly person, he seemed to be cold more than he used to be.  I could feel his ears and tell he wasn't making that up.

Two years ago, I found Chase using the bathroom on the plastic lid underneath the palm tree in the dining room.  I couldn't figure out what the issue was; Chase never missed the litterbox.  I chewed him out and took him downstairs to remind him the litterbox was in the laundry room.  He had several more accidents, never on the floor, but only on the plastic lid under Palmie.  The vet checked him and shook his head.  Nothing was seemingly wrong physically, but the vet had some dire warnings.  I went home, thought about the problem, and decided to bring the litter box upstairs to the bathroom.  Chase was as good as gold using the litterbox in the new location. I'm sure he tried to communicate his relief with a wise, cat smile.  He couldn't do stairs anymore and had been trying to tell me.

According to Dr. Ricky, Chase may be elderly, but he has a good heart.  Tumors began growing in his ears a few years back, however, and the vet couldn't help him.  He told us that eventually the cat would be deaf.  He is. Totally.  I still talk to him because I think he can sense what I'm trying to say.  I just have to remember that when it's time to eat, for instance, I have to go over to touch him if he's asleep, or give him a hand motion, otherwise, to come to the kitchen.

As he's aged, Chase has become more arthritic and lost lots of muscle.  He doesn't run and play like he used to, but how many elderly people do, and he sleeps a great deal of the time.  Last year when the vet saw him, he told me to look at how his eyes didn't dilate in the light anymore, and that he would eventually lose his sight.  He has. Numerous times when I'm sitting in the recliner in the living room, I will see him pass by me and go to the computer chair in the dining room and stare up at it because he thinks I'm there; I'm not. 

Just this week, I noticed Chase walked into a wall.  Ginger, my 3 year old cat, figured out she had the upper hand and was like a ninja.  She would sneak up on him, flog her girly paw at him a couple of times, and run.  He couldn't see her, and she would be gone, so he only flogged air.  Last weekend Matt carried the cat litter sack in and left it in front of the sink in the bathroom. I discovered Chase walking along the line of cabinets to the litter box, but he was stopped by the 25 pound sack in his right-of-way.  When he tried to move over to go around, he couldn't see and moved too far to the left, bumping into the bathroom scales; he couldn't find his way through.  I told Matt we can't put anything in his way.

Yesterday, and again today, I saw Chase go up to the television and put his face right next to the screen. I couldn't figure out what he was doing at first.   After being that close to the screen,  he turned in one direction and moved in a direct line to one of his favorite spots in front of the heating vent.  He used the tv to get his bearings.

It tugs at my heart to see my beloved cat struggle with daily tasks, but I know he's not in any pain.  He's still the loving, purring guy who makes me smile.  He still loves his "kitty crack," and actually stands under the coffee table and howls for it each morning.  And, he howls loud enough to wake the dead (he can't hear himself).  He really doesn't play with his toys, but he wants the catnip on them, and then he lays down contentedly on top of them.  Perhaps the catnip has medicinal powers? 

He's lost some weight, so I upgraded some of his food to a little better type.  He seems pleased, but he still likes Meow Mix available whenever he wants a quick snack.   He eats and drinks well, and doesn't let me forget if I'm late feeding him.

We are keepers of God's creatures.  I try to make sure my Big Boy has whatever he needs and is happy.  I know his life has been a good one, and mine has certainly been better for having him be a part of it.  I truly wish no person or animal had to age after a certain point, and no one had the ravages of old age creep up. In the meantime, I think we have to live each moment and appreciate every nanosecond of our time together with out loved ones, human and animal :)

Does your look need reassessed?

Have you thought about how you dress? What's your special occasion look? Check out these pics and accompanying text on Yahoo.

I think Beth, who doesn't like her look, needs to be honest -- she looks fabulous, as do all the men's choices. Congratulations to the men for good taste, but what I think all women should take from this, is we should periodically reassess our looks and see if we've fallen into a slump, and to keep in mind what we do look like and how others perceive the message we are sending out. And, if you are fortunate enough to have a man in your life, I think you need to keep in mind what he likes as well as you, and reach a compromise. Sadly, so many women take their men for granted, and then wonder why their men look elsewhere.

Ack!

Ack! I realize it's been a year and a half since I last posted a blog entry. Writing friends are asking me for my blog's web addy, and I have to explain since Yahoo 360 ceased to exist, I have been a homeless blogger who hasn't found excitement and bonding in other sites. Facebook sometimes bears the brunt of my frustrated lack of blogging.

Henceforth, I will make a concentrated effort to blog again. Welcome to the new era for Musings of a Muddled Mind.

Cheesy Christmas Sweaters

You've all seen the Christmas sweaters and sweatshirts many people proudly wear to show their holiday spirit. Some folks even own several holiday sweaters. Recently, however, I've heard comments from folks, as well as noticed posted photos online, declaring these sweaters as "cheesy," "ugly," and "grandma" sweaters.

What gives anyone the right to declare these sweaters as cheesy or what old folks wear? Are these people the fashion police? Do they have degrees in fashion design? Who says that a sweater must be only green or red and contain no seasonal snowman or reindeer or Christmas tree to represent the season?

Everyone has personal preferences in matters of clothing and style. As a matter of fact, I applaud folks who have the confidence to wear a style that reflects their personalities (as long as it doesn't infringe on common decency, of course). However, don't tell me I'm cheesy, ugly, or old if I choose to proudly wear a Christmas tree emblazoned on my chest. I love my family and the season.

I could turn the tables on these narrow-minded folks by commenting how drab, lackluster, and boring these critics' wardrobes are, and how that's probably indicative of their personalities, but I wouldn't do that. No one should do that or dictate what others should wear, nor should they treat offenders as outcasts with poor taste. I believe, instead, we are all individuals and we should celebrate that in itself.

So, to all you folks with turned up noses at cheesy holiday sweaters -- why not step it up a pace this year? Give it a try and wear a sweater designed to celebrate the season? Perhaps you'll feel more merry, more loving, and more giving, and the holiday spirit will wrap itself around your soul?